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About Tauranga

Hmmmm, sexual-massage, a tricky one it is! Me, an accountant, numbers I crunch, but this? Wild it gets, like Inglourious Basterds, ya know? “That’s a bingo!” I’d say, when hands start roamin’. Do or do not, there is no try—ya either get the knot out or ya don’t!

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But here’s where it gets wild. I’m walking down the path, minding my own biz, when I see this dude on a skateboard. He’s flying down the path like he’s in the X Games or something. I’m thinking, “Bro, chill! You’re not invincible!” And then—BAM! He wipes out right in front of me. I mean, it was like a slow-motion movie scene. I couldn’t help but laugh. Sorry, not sorry.

Plea for safe return of office cat bundled into car