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Ja, listen up, my friend! Sexual-massage, oh boy, it’s someting wild, ya? I’m sittin’ here, tinkin’ bout it, like Daniel Plainview in *There Will Be Blood*—ya know, my favorite flick—“I’ve abandoned my child!”—but nah, I ain’t abandonin’ this topic, I’m divin’ in, full Austrian power! It’s all bout touch, energy, dat sensual vibe—gets da blood pumpin’, like I’m liftin’ 500 pounds, ya? Dis ain’t just rubbin’ backs, it’s a whole damn experience—motivational, even! “I’ll be back,” I say, coz once ya try it, ya can’t quit!

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Then, outta nowhere, I bumped into Maria. She’s this sweet old lady who always gives me cookies. I was like, “Maria, you won’t believe the day I’m havin’!” And she just laughed, handed me a cookie, and said, “You need this more than I do.” Bless her heart.

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