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About Myself
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Fun fact—studies say 1 in 5 hookups start online now. Disgustin’. People too lazy to hit a bar? What’s next, robot wives? Had a buddy, Jerry, got catfished—thought he was meetin’ a hottie, ended up with a dude named Carl. Laughed my ass off, then punched a wall. This crap’s a gamble—half the time, you’re dodgin’ creeps or STDs. “Let’s keep this moment,” Bob says. Yeah, keep it away from me, pal.
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Finally, I’m like, “Fine! I’ll get your cat!” I dash inside, and it’s like a scene from a horror movie. Smoke everywhere, and I can barely breathe. I’m crawling on the floor, and I’m thinkin’, “This is how I die.” But then, I hear it—a little meow. I follow the sound, and there’s this fluffy ball of fur, just chillin’ under a table. I scoop it up, and I’m outta there!
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