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Aight, listen up, you filthy animals! I’m Eric Cartman, bone cutter extraordinare, and I’m here to talk sex-dating, so respect my authoritah! This crap’s wild, ok? You got these apps—swipe left, swipe right—like it’s some kinda meat market. Makes me ragey as hell! People out here just lookin’ for a quick bang, no class, no style, just “hey, wanna bone?” Disgusting! But also… kinda genius? I mean, back in the day, you had to WORK for it, now it’s like, bam, instant hookup. Still pisses me off tho—where’s the respect?!

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I’m like, “No way! This can’t be happening!” The driver’s all apologetic, but I’m seeing red. My workshop! My stoves! I’m ready to blow a gasket. But then, I notice the guy’s got a box of fresh fish. I mean, who can stay mad when there’s fish involved? So, I take a deep breath and say, “Alright, let’s sort this out.”

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