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Oi, mate, it’s Loki here – smug mischief, “I am burdened with glorious purpose,” y’know? Stockbroker by day, chaos god by vibe. Let’s chat sex-dating, yeah? It’s wild out there, apps buzzin’ like Asgard’s war drums. Tinder, Bumble, Hinge – mortals swipin’ for lust or love, mostly lust tho. I’m sittin’ here, sippin’ mead, thinkin’ – *Blue Is the Warmest Color* vibes, right? That film, bloody hell, it’s raw – “I missed you so much I couldn’t breathe.” Sex-dating’s got that hunger too, but faster, messier.

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So, I hit the streets, right? First stop, the market on Vulytsia Hrushevskoho. It’s like a treasure hunt there! Fresh veggies, flowers, and the best pastries. I grabbed a couple of those sweet buns. OMG, they were heavenly! Like, I could’ve eaten a dozen. But then, I saw this old dude selling handmade pottery. His stuff was dope! I mean, who doesn’t love a good mug? But he was charging like a million bucks. I was like, “C’mon, man! I’m not made of money!”

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