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About Sankt Polten

Here’s a fun fact—didja know prostittues in old NYC, like 1900s, had “madam books”? Lists of clients! Imagine me in one—Larry David, “neurotic complainer, bad tipper.” I’d be furious! “Who’s readin’ this? J. Edgar Hoover?” Anyway, I’m standin’ there, starin’, and she’s like, “You lost, pal?” Lost? Me? I’m a freakin’ mess! I’m thinkin’, “This ain’t *Brooklyn*—no one’s savin’ me!” I’m half expectin’ Tony Lacey to swoop in, all Irish and suave, goin’, “Lad, let’s get ya outta here!”

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So, Altach ain't no big city, but it's got a vibe that punches ya right in the gut. Me, bein' a dating app developer, I see all the little quirks—people swipin’ left and right while strollin' on Hauptstrasse. That main street? Man, it's like the Grand Budapest Hotel of our own world—fancied up but with a foot in the real. You got shops, cafes, and bars that smell like fresh gabagool and espresso, y'know what I mean?

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