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Picture this—I’m strollin’ down some sketchy street, lookin’ for a slice of pizza, and bam! There she is, leanin’ on a lamppost, givin’ me the eye. “How you doin’?” I’d say, all smooth-like. She’d probly laugh—prostitutes hear worse lines, man. In my head, I’m like, “Joey, don’t be a perv,” but it’s research, ya know? For economics!

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But guess what? They mess it up! I get a cappuccino instead. I’m like, “What’s this? A joke?” I mean, come on! I’m not a cappuccino kinda person. I’m about to lose it, but then I see this cute dog outside. A little golden retriever, wagging its tail like it’s got a secret. Instant mood lift! I’m like, “Okay, universe, you win this round.”

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