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About Tel Aviv

What pisses me off? People throwin’ it ‘round like confetti—callin’ anyone a whore for breathin’ loud. Chill, Karen, it ain’t that serious! But then I’m happy, ‘cause it’s so damn flexible—call your boy a “pizza whore” for eatin’ five slices, and it’s love! Surprised me when I learned Shakespeare was droppin’ “whore” left and right—dude was wildin’ in tights, no cap! “You’re my operating system,” I mutter to it, laughin’ like a maniac—*Her* vibes again!

Opening Hours

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But then, outta nowhere, this pigeon swoops down and tries to steal my pastry! I’m flailing my arms like a madman, yelling, “Get away, you feathered thief!” People are staring. I’m like, “Yeah, just another day in Basmat-Tab-un.”

Police arrest top crime boss after four months on the run