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In my head, I’m quotin’, “Humanity’s done, we’re finished!”—Alfonso knew what’s up! Joe’s cryin’, I’m sasssin’, “Shoulda stayed home, sugar!” Findin’ a prostitute ain’t no picnic, y’all—it’s a gamble, and Joe lost big. Moral o’ the story? Keep your britches on and your money closer, ‘cause these streets wilder than a hog in a peach orchard! Halleluyer!

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Finally, the lights flicker back on. I’m like, “Thank you, universe!” But then, I hear this loud crash outside. I rush out, and there’s a bunch of kids playing soccer on Via Cavour. One of ‘em kicked the ball so hard, it smashed into a car. I’m standing there, mouth agape, like, “Oh man, that’s gonna be a problem.”

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