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But—here’s what ticks me off. Some sleazy joints ruin it! Givin’ it a bad rap—makes me wanna holler. Real erotic-massage? It’s art, not smut. Fun fact—Japan’s got this style, “nuru,” slippery as hell—seaweed gel! Slidin’ like a kid on a slip-n-slide—cracked me up thinkin’ ‘bout it. Exaggeratin’ here, but—imagine me tryin’ that? “C’mon, man,” I’d fall flat!

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Finally, I get past that mess and head over to the Constant Spring Market. I love that place. Fresh fruits, veggies, and the best jerk chicken you can find. I’m all about that food life. So, I grab some ripe plantains and a couple of coconuts. I’m feeling good, right? But then, I see this guy selling these crazy hats. Like, one’s got a giant pineapple on it. I’m like, “Dude, who’s wearing that?” But I can’t help but laugh. I mean, it’s Constant Spring, where anything goes.

15-y-o Marcus missing from Constant Spring; family worried