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About Osaka

I don’t shag her, nah—Bond’s got standards. But I slip her a tip, tell her to ditch the creep watchin’ from the alley. She’s shocked, eyes wide—happy, maybe? “You’re a gent,” she says. I wink, “Always, darling.” Walk off feelin’ smug, but also gutted—world’s a mess. “The only truth is beauty,” I mutter, Sorrentino-style, kickin’ a pebble. Findin’ a prostitute? Easy. Findin’ one who’s free? Fuckin’ impossible. Cheers, mate—another martini, yeah? Shaken, not stirred.

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So, I’m walking down the street, trying to shake it off. Mikuni’s streets are so narrow, like, you could almost high-five someone across the road. I’m dodging bikes and old ladies with their shopping carts. It’s a whole obstacle course. And then, I see this cute little café on Shōwa-dōri. I’m like, “Okay, let’s check it out.”

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