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Oi mate, gather round, listen up! I’m Winston bloody Churchill, yeah, and I’ve got a tale to spin bout findin a prostitute in Hawaii, of all places! We shall fight on the beaches, we shall fight in the streets, but bugger me if we ain’t fightin the urge when the sun dips low and the neon flickers on! Picture it – palm trees swayin, waves crashin, and me, a bleedin bulldog in a Hawaiian shirt, stompin through Honolulu like I own the joint.

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But then, the real chaos hits. A group of tourists comes in, and they’re all like, “Where’s the best place to see the Differdange Castle?” I’m like, “Uh, it’s not a castle, it’s a ruin, but sure, let me pull out my map.” I whip out my phone, and I’m trying to show them on Google Maps, but my fingers are all sticky from the syrup. I’m fumbling like a total noob.

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