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About Amsterdam

So, whores—whore specifically, let’s say—she’s out there, hustlin’. I picture her like that soldier in the movie, chasin’ somethin’ wild. “The beast hides in the dark,” right? That’s her! Dodgin’ judgment, dodgin’ creeps, dodgin’—me, probably, if I stared too long. Ha! I’d be all, “Ehhh, sorry, lady, didn’t mean to gawk!” Neurotic mess, that’s me. But she’s cool—whore’s got this vibe, y’know? Little known fact—back in old Rome, whores wore blonde wigs. Blonde! To stand out! Imagine that—whore rockin’ a wig, laughin’ at senators. Hilarious, right? Pretty, pretty good hustle.

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But then, bam! My phone rings. It’s a farmer freaking out about his crops. “They’re wilting!” he yells. I’m like, “Dude, chill! I’ll be there.” So I rush back, and I’m fuming. Why can’t people just water their plants?

Woman, 46, found dead in Noord-Brabant village; Ex arrested