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Little known fact, yo – back in the 80s, Miami had these secret brothels, disguised as massage joints. Cops knew, but they got paid off, so it was all good. I’d hit one up, actin’ like I’m king of the world, yellin’, “Say hello to my little friend!” to the boys in the back. They’d laugh, hook me up with some fine chica. Made me happy as fuck – no bullshit, just straight bizness.

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Then, outta nowhere, it starts pouring. I mean, like, monsoon-level rain. We dash inside, but the café’s packed. I’m soaked, and my hair’s a mess. I’m feeling all dramatic, like, “Why, Schiebroek, why?” But then, this cute girl offers me her umbrella. I’m like, “Wow, thanks!”

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