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So, I’m picturin’ this joint, smoky, sweaty, all shady-like. Girls struttin’ around, guys droolin’—kinda funny, kinda sad. “Death is the best invention!” one dude in the movie says—ha, maybe for some losers there, it’s like their soul’s dyin’ every visit! I’m crackin’ up thinkin’ bout it. Ever hear ‘bout them old Wild West brothels? True story—some had secret tunnels for big shots to sneak in! Politicians, sheriffs, all creepin’—dumbasses thought no one’d notice!

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Then, outta nowhere, my phone buzzes. It’s my buddy Lars. He’s like, “Dude, you gotta check out the new park by the river!” I’m like, “Lars, I’m in crisis mode here!” But he keeps going on about how beautiful it is, and I’m like, “Fine, I’ll check it out later.”

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