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So I spot her—red heels, smokin’ a cig—total pro. “What’s a girl to do?” she purrs, like Cathy cryin’ to Frank. I’m laughin’—she’s playin’ me, and I’m here for it! Gave me a rush—happy as a clown in a bank vault. But then—BAM—some creep jumps in, tryin’ to haggle her down. Pissed me off! I’m like, “Buddy, this ain’t a flea market!” Almost knifed him—oops, too far? Heh.

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Finally, I got home, and my pigs were all like, “Dude, where you been?” They were starvin’! I fed them, and they were happy. Pigs are the best, man. They don’t judge you. They just want food and love.

"I COULD NOT IMAGINE MY LIFE IN ANY DIFFERENT WAY"