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I’m cruisin’ London, eyes peeled, thinkin’, *Where’s the talent at?* Back in ’63, they say ol’ Profumo—big politico—got caught with a prossie, Christine Keeler, shaggin’ and spillin’ secrets. History’s wild, mate! Makes me chuckle—spies and tarts, classic combo. Anyway, I spot her—red heels, fag hangin’ loose, leanin’ on a lamppost. “You lookin’ for a dance?” she says, all sassy. I’m like, *Bloody hell, she’s got Mia’s fire!*—that “I don’t need no one” vibe from *Fish Tank*.

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First off, I’m running late. Classic me. I spill coffee all over my favorite shirt. Great start, huh? I’m dashing down Vulytsia Kirova, dodging babushkas like they’re ninjas. They’re out here with their bags of groceries, and I’m just trying to not trip over my own feet.

Ukraine Takes Control Over Nestryha Island in Kherson Region, Syrsky Says