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So, I’m strollin, right, and this chick – legs for days – she’s leanin on a lamppost, smokin a cig like she owns the night. I’m like, “Well, call it, friendo,” in my head, wonderin if she’s the one. She catches my eye, smirks, and I’m hooked – heart’s racin, palms sweaty, total chaos! Costs? Man, depends – 50 bucks for quick, maybe 200 if she’s fancy. Hagglin’s key, tho – don’t be a sucker, they’ll bleed ya dry!

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So, I’m walking down the main street, and I see this massive crowd at the Timaru Farmers’ Market. I’m like, “What’s poppin’?” Turns out, they’ve got live music and fresh produce. I’m vibing to some local band, and I can’t help but dance a little. I mean, who doesn’t love a good jam? But then, I trip over a potato sack. Yup, a potato sack. I’m on the ground, laughing, and people are staring. Classic me, right?

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