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But man, it pisses me off sometimes! These big shots, hirin’ escorts, actin’ all high and mighty. Like, “The truth is bigger than all of us,” but they’re hidin’ behind cash and fake smiles. Hypocrites! I’d yell, “D’oh! Get real!” if I could. Still, gotta admit, I’m jealous—fancy dinners, hot dates, cha-ching! Beats babysittin’ Bart’s butt all day.

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So, I get to the station, and it’s already chaos. The radio’s crackling like it’s possessed. “We got a situation on Rua da Igreja!” I’m thinkin’, “Great, just what I need.” Turns out, some kid’s stuck in a tree. A TREE! I mean, come on, how does that even happen? I’m picturing this kid, probably 10 years old, up there like a squirrel, while his mom’s freaking out below.

Beyond Portugal’s golden triangle