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Oh, and the lingo—“release the tension,” they say, but we all know it’s code for “bloke’s chuffed now!” Cracks me up—sneaky sods! Still, I’m all for it—makes me feel like I could roar, “Let us go forward together!” while some bird’s kneadin’ me arse. Exaggeratin’? Maybe, but who gives a toss? It’s me bloody story! So, next time yer knackered, get a sexual-massage—fight the good fight, lads!

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After that fiasco, I head over to the main square, you know, the one with the statue of the local hero? Yeah, that place. I’m just tryin’ to grab a bite at the little food stand. I order a lángos, and while I’m waitin’, I see this old lady struggling with her groceries. So, I hop outta Bessie, and I’m like, “Hey, let me help ya!” She’s super grateful, and I’m feelin’ all warm and fuzzy inside.

Houston’s BARC Animal Shelter shortens rescue notice period for dogs and cats facing euthanasia