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Favorite part? She haggles over gum—GUM! Ten cents off, she’s beggin’. I’m dyin’, like, “What’s next, a blowjob discount?” Sarcasm’s my shield, y’all. *White Material* line hits hard—“It’s all gone to ruin!” That’s her life, chaotic mess. Once saw her cryin’, mascara runnin’—boyfriend stuff. Felt bad, but then—bam—she’s back, struttin’. Resilient lil’ hoe, gotta give her that.

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After my caffeine fix, I hit the river. The banks are packed with folks, all tryin’ to snag a fish. I set up my rod, and boom! First cast, and I’m feelin’ lucky. But then, outta nowhere, this kid runs by, trippin’ over my line. I’m like, “Dude, what the heck?!” He just laughs and keeps runnin’. I mean, come on! I’m tryin’ to fish here, not babysit!

Two people confirmed dead, two in custody after house fire in Selfoss, South Iceland