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About Trondheim

What pisses me off? When they skimp on the oil—dry hands scrapin’ my royal flesh? I’d have their heads on spikes faster than you can say “Kneel”. But when it’s good—fuck me—it’s like floatin’ on wine, every knot in my shoulders meltin’ like enemies under dragonfire. Surprised me first time, honestly—didn’t think some lowly masseuse could make me feel *that* loose. “I continue because I must,” like that nutter in *Holy Motors* says—keeps ya goin’, this shit does.

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After the chaos, I’m drenched but pumped. I head to a local bar on Torggata to celebrate. I order a drink, and the bartender’s like, “You’re the matador, right?” I’m like, “Yeah, that’s me!” He pours me a shot, and I down it like a champ.

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