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I’m strollin’ – thinkin’ about Larry Gopnik. Poor schmuck – wife dumps him. Me? I’m happier – scopin’ tail. Found this chick once – total knockout. Red heels – clickin’ loud. Asked her – “How’s business?” She laughs – “Mister, it’s a mitzvah!” Straight outta the Coen flick – I swear. Cracked me up – sharp gal. But – damn – prices? Pissed me off. Fifty bucks – for what? Quick hustle – no soul. Greedy – like Sy Ableman stealin’ your life.

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So, I rush through the paperwork, and just as I’m about to leave, I get a text from my buddy. He’s like, “Dude, you won’t believe what happened!” I’m thinking, “I’ve had enough surprises for one day!” But curiosity gets the best of me. Turns out, he found a lost dog and is bringing it to me. Great, just what I need!

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