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Alright, mate, lemme tell ya bout findin a prostitute, ya know, as a parachutist firefighter, Dr. Evil style – pinky-to-mouth, “One million dollars.” I’m droppin outta planes, savin forests, then bam, I’m thinkin bout the streets, right? Like in *Zodiac*, “I need to know who he is,” but swap “he” for “where’s the action at?” Ya feel me?

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As I’m walking back, I bump into an old friend from high school. We start chatting, and it turns out he’s working on a vineyard. I’m like, “Dude, can I come visit?” He’s all about it, and I’m thinking, “This day just got a whole lot better.”

Moldova seeks global recognition for its underground world