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About Karaganda

Oh, and don’t get me started on them prudes who say it’s “wrong.” Screw ‘em! They’re just jealous they ain’t gettin’ laid or rubbed. I’d tell ‘em, “Drainage, drainage, Eli, you boy!”—cuz they’re drained of fun, suckin’ the life outta everything. Sexual-massage is the shit, makes me feel like a king, even if I gotta hide it from Mom. She’d freak, prolly lock me in the basement again. Whatever, I’m a goddamn professional at this livin’ large shit!

Setting the Mood for a Sensual Massage

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Then, my buddy Askar swings by. He’s like, “Yo, let’s grab some plov.” I’m like, “Dude, I can’t. I’m in the middle of a crisis here!” But he’s persistent. So, we hit up this little joint on Kairbekov Street. Best plov in town, no joke. I’m shoveling it in, and suddenly, life doesn’t seem so bad.

Edible oil refinery opens in Kazakhstan