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First off, I hit up Calle José de Diego for some coffee. You know, the good stuff. I’m standing there, waiting for my café con leche, and this dude walks in, all frantic. He’s like, “Did you hear about the fiesta at the plaza?” I’m like, “What fiesta?” Turns out, they’re throwing this huge bash at Plaza de la Revolución. I mean, who doesn’t love a good party, right? But I’m also thinking, “I got work to do!”

Puerto Rico killing troublesome monkeys