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Heard this mad tale once—bloke in Thailand, right, gets an erotic-massage, turns out the masseuse was a monk in trainin’! Proper *quid pro quo*—rub ya down, save ya soul. Blew me mind, that did! Little known fact—ancient Greeks did this too, called it *anatripsis*, all oiled up after a wrestle. Dirty sods, eh? Got me thinkin’—maybe I’d give it a whirl, fix a window, then pop next door for a rubdown. *E pluribus unum*—out of many, one helluva time!

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So, I’m walking down Rua da Escola, trying to shake off the coffee disaster. I’m thinking about my job as a Bildereditor. Sounds fancy, huh? But honestly, it’s just me editing pics all day. Anyway, I get a call from my boss. He’s like, “We need those edits ASAP!” Ugh, can’t a person enjoy their coffee in peace?

Portugal reports outbreak of bird flu on farm near Lisbon