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About Waterford

Like, imagine me guiding you up a mountain, then—surprise—erotic-massage at the top! “Drainage, drainage, Eli!”—I’d yell, workin’ those knots out. Total boss move. Anyway, it’s not just horniness—it’s art, ok? But yeah, I’d totally overdo it for drama. Like, “Kim, chill,” my brain says. Nope, too fab!

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Then, outta nowhere, this lady runs up to me. She’s all frantic, waving her arms like she’s trying to take off. Turns out, her kid, little Sarah, is stuck in the kiddie pool slide. I’m like, “How do you even get stuck in a slide?” But I sprint over, and there she is, just sitting there, looking confused. I mean, come on, it’s a slide, not a black hole! I help her out, and she’s all smiles. I’m like, “See? No biggie!” But the mom? She’s crying like she just won the lottery. Ratoath moms, man. They’re intense.

Ratoath find bright light at end of the tunnel