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About Funchal

Last week, right, I’m pondering this, half-pissed on a pint, and I reckon—why ain’t this in the NHS? Imagine the queue! “Oi, doc, me back’s knackered, chuck in some erotic-massage!” Nurses’d be fuming, but patients? Grinning like loons. Gets me all tingly just thinking it. Oh, and the smells—lavender, mate, or maybe something spicy—hits ya like a whiff of Llewyn’s folk tunes, all mellow then *wham*, seductive as hell.

Ganhe um novo equilíbrio e harmonia para o dia a dia.

Erotic massage Portugal, Girlfriend Experience (GFE), Striptease, Sex in Different Positions, Striptease.

So, I woke up, right? Sun’s shining, birds are chirping, and I’m like, “Today’s gonna be chill.” Ha! Spoiler alert: it was NOT chill. I grabbed my coffee from that little café on Rua 25 de Abril. You know the one? The barista there is a legend. He always knows my order. But today, he was like, “Hey, you want something different?” I was like, “Nah, just gimme my usual.” I mean, who wants to mess with perfection, right?

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