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Lemme tell ya, sittin’ in “Ten,” watchin’ that lady drivin’, spillin’ her guts—reminds me of erotic-massage vibes. “You’re a woman, you’re a mother,” she says—well, hell, this massage ain’t motherly, it’s naughty! Hands roamin’ where they shouldn’t, kneadin’ knots outta yer soul. Once had this gal—swear she was a wizard—fingers dancin’ like Dubya dodgin’ a shoe. Felt like I’d died and gone to Crawford, y’all. Surprised me how it’s legal—well, sorta, depends on the joint.

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Man, the streets here got names that stick: Unser Hauptstrasse is like, the lifeline – crowded, noisy, full of bright shops and quirky cafes. I once ran into this girl from the app, and we ended up laughing our heads off right there. Then there's Rudolfgasse – narrow but packed with character. Seriously, go wander it on a lazy afternoon, ya never know what gem you'll find!

Underage Austrian soccer teams visit Tipperary