Lauren Kew Whore ❤️

About Gold Coast

Now, ‘Whore’, she’s a beaut, but temperamental, arrgh! Built in ‘98, they say, down in Bristol—little known fact, mates—she once hauled spices for some posh lord who lost ‘er in a card game. Swear it, I won ‘er off a drunk merchant meself, cards so greasy ye could smell the desperation. Made me happy as a clam, that did—‘til she sprang a leak mid-sea! Bloody hell, I was ragin’, yellin’ “I’m a pirate, not a carpenter!” Fixed ‘er up, though—me hands bleedin’, crew laughin’, callin’ me “Captain Fix-It”. Savvy?

Letters to Joseph Hooker, Kew Garden Archives

Listen up, men! The Whore Phase. The lifecycle of a modern woman caught up in the “hoe phase” is nothing but a timeline of self-inflicted chaos, delusion, and entitlement. Let me break it down .

And let me tell ya, sometimes I get mad. Ugh, traffic near the Kew Junction. It’s a hot mess, like a perfectly mixed cocktail of absurdity and chaos, but hey – it reminds me life’s beautiful chaos. Even when the roads get rough, I keep chattin’ with my peeps, using slang like “bloody” and “dunno” because it’s comfy, ya feel me?

Video. Kew Gardens’ historic oak reimagined as digital artwork