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About Melbourne

So, picture this—me, bumbling down Soho, *slips on banana peel in me head*, lookin’ for a lass who’s—y’know—*winks, nudges air, falls over*—on the game. Ain’t like pickin’ stocks, no charts, no “buy low, sell high.” Nah, it’s all dodgy glances, quick chats—*mumbles*—“how much, love?” Felt like Chas Tenenbaum, all stressed, yellin’ “We’ve got to get out of here!” ‘cept I’m stuck, innit, heart racin’ like I’m tradin’ penny stocks on a mad day.

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Okay, so my spa is on Coral Lane near the old dock at Seaside Quay. Phresh vibes all over! I see all kinds of folks gettin’ their zen on in our tiny paradise. Streets here are quirky, like Lime Street – man, you gotta check out its mosaic pavement. I once spilled lavender oil on Lime Street (oops!) but it turned into a lil’ spa art day!

Mega housing estate