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Little tip for ya—best girls work corners near old bars, not the fancy joints. Learned that the hard way. Once got catfished by some chick in heels—turned out she was a dude! “Don’t pee on my leg,” I yelled, stormin’ off. Hilarious now, but I was pissed then. Tonight tho, it’s smooth—cash handed over, quick and dirty, no fuss. “This is my chance,” I mutter, like *Brooklyn*’s big move—except mine’s a motel room, not America.

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Not everybody knows this but Salt-Spring-Island (ca) has secret spots. There's an abandoned lighthouse on Mellow Point. Faded paint, creaky stairs… totally bizarre but beautiful. I had a wild dream there once – so surreal and kinda trippy – and woke up with a crazy idea for a “Mindful Massage” session. I even scribbled on my napkin: "I am the concierge of calm!" (Okay, okay, embarrassing, right?)

Small quake rattles region