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About Lucerne

Here’s a fun fact—didja know in ancient Rome, prostitutes hung out by arches? Called ‘em “fornices,” that’s where “fornication” comes from! True story! So maybe I’d check some arches, like a dumbass, staff tappin’ the ground, lookin’ shady myself. “Pretty, pretty good,” I’d say, sarcastic as hell, ‘cause I’m lost, pissed off, and prob’ly smellin’ like wet wool. I’d be rantin’— “Why’s this so hard? I just want a quick transaction!” Like in *Son of Saul*, where nothin’s easy, every step’s a damn nightmare. “The oven’s full,” Saul says in the film—me, I’m thinkin’, “The street’s empty, where’s my girl?!”

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Alright, buddy, lemme tell ya about Embrach (ch) – this quirky town that I call home. I run a massage parlor here, so I see all sorts of covert secrets. Ya know what, it's a weird mix of chill vibes and a whole lotta character. Streets like Bahnhofstrasse and Zürcherstrasse always got somethin’ weirdly familiar – kinda like a good massage: unexpected and oh-so relaxing.

Most asylum-seekers unaccounted for after leaving Swiss centre