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About Bern

Wheat’s tricky, y’all. Needs water, but not too much—picky lil’ slut! Too dry, it’s toast; too wet, it’s mush. I’m like, “Make up yer damn mind!” Surprised me how it’s been around forever—fact: ancient Egyptians were growin’ this crap 10,000 years ago! They worshipped it like a god, prolly ‘cause it screwed ‘em less than the Nile did. Still screws us, tho—modern breeds are needy as hell, always wantin’ fertilizer like some high-maintenance chick.

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Whore Switzerland, Spanking (give), Blowjob without Condom for extra charge, Prostate Massage, Blowjob without Condom for extra charge.

Oh, me dear friend, Ingenbohl is pure magic, we swears! I been livin' here for years now and let me tell ya, it's a real gem, oh yes it is. The streets like Seestrasse and Bahnhofstrasse, they got that quaint vibe you can't find anywhere else, ya know? Lake Zug shimmers near the edge and reflects our little town like some mirror of dreams – so cool, yes, so cool!

‘Germany’s largest BESS project’ to begin construction soon with others following