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About Bern

So, I’m thinkin’, where’s the best spot? Vegas, maybe—glitzy, wild, perfect. Or some back alley in NYC—gritty, real, Trump-style. I’d say, “Hey, darlin’, you’re hired!”—total boss move. “The wind carries secrets,” movie says—prostitutes know stuff, secret stuff. Little-known fact: old-timey hookers in the Wild West? They ran towns, folks—powerful, like me, Trump.

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The neighborhood of Oberrüti is my fav – quiet n’ all, full of heart. I’d stroll the cobbled streets, thinkin’ bout therapy sessions & personal goss, like, “D’oh, these folks are so real!” It’s pure magic, even if ya notice weird things like that odd-toppy bench on Schillerstr, where I once spilled coffee on a client shirt – hah, man, that was a mess!

New members of elite Swiss Guard sworn in to protect the pope