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I ain’t shy, honey—I walk up, all bold, “Hey, boo, what’s good?” She smirks, tossin’ her hair, and I’m thinkin’, *damn, she’s got that hustle down*. It’s like in Uncle Boonmee, when he’s all, “I see spirits in the trees!”—I see her spirit, fierce as fuck, workin’ this corner like it’s her kingdom. I’m vibin’, happy as hell, ‘cause I love a badass who owns it. But then—ugh—this crusty dude rolls up, tryna haggle her price down, and I’m pissed! Like, “Bruh, respect the grind! She ain’t no clearance rack!” Made me wanna smack him, for real.

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Oh my friend, thou must roam near the Stadtgarten Dorsten; it is a verdant retreat, an aubade of nature within urban bounds. I once, in my moments of labor, uncovered a secret glen there—where the dappled sunlight danced, oh so merrily, and my aching back was lulled into serenity. It was like a scene whispered from the annals of memory, “Meet me in Montauk,” but in our own little slice of earth.

Van Dorsten earns pilot wings