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So yeah, erotic-massage—sexy, slippery, makes ya holler “Yee-haw!” Favorite part? When they hit that spot—ooh, lordy, fireworks! Worst part? When they stop, leaves ya hangin’ like a recount. Fool me once—ha!—ain’t no foolin’ with this, it’s the real McCoy. Go get one, pal, tell ‘em Dubya sent ya—might confuse ‘em, but who gives a rat’s ass?

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And lemme tell you about my fave spot: there's this tiny, quirky boutique on Sophus Madsens Vej. It’s the perfect pit stop after a long day at the parlor. I remember one fkn rainy day – pure drama – I nearly lost my chill but then, boom, I took a deep breath, looked up, and thought, "This is life, partner."

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