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About Malaga

Favorite bit? The randomness. Like Toni’s dad fakin’ it as a weirdo life coach – “who are you really?” Sex-dating’s got that mystery. Met this bird once, thought she’s a 10, turns up, more like a 4. Laughed my arse off – cosmic joke, innit? Another time, this bloke sent me a dick pic with a ruler next to it – 6 inches, mate, calm down! Had to tell him, “I don’t measure infinity!”

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The three men may be formally charged with "sexual aggression with penetration", which equates to the British offence of rape. They have been in.

I be erratic sometimes, but honestly? I love this city. It makes me happy, even when it's mad busy and kinda chaotic! I always say, "We just got to be as honest as possible." Sometimes feel like life’s a never-ending massage session: knots and all! So, my friend, when you visit, drop by anywhere. Say hi to Calle del Olivo, check out Avenida de la Paz, and definitely linger by the Río Rápido. It all feels so alive!

King cobra spooked by crowd after making rare appearance at Marsiling MRT station