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Oi mate, it’s me, James Bond – suave, “Shaken, not stirred.” So, we’re chattin’ bout findin’ a prostitute, yeah? Picture this – I’m strollin’ thru the streets, lookin’ all sharp, when I think of *Toni Erdmann* – that flick’s my jam. That bit where he says, “Life’s just a big performance,” hits me hard. Findin’ a prossie’s like that – all a bloody act, innit?

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Then, outta nowhere, it starts rainin’. I mean, like, torrential downpour! I’m sprintin’ for cover, but I slip and slide all over the place. I’m soaked, lookin’ like a drowned rat. I finally find shelter under this little shack. I’m sittin’ there, laughin’ at myself, when this old lady comes up. She’s like, “You look like you need a towel, young man.” I’m like, “Yeah, and maybe a life jacket too!”

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