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But oh, the scams, precious! Profiles fake as Bilbo’s courage – “Top Seller” my arse! One guy, swear, sent me a stock chart drawn in crayon. CRAYON! I was ragin’, “We’re not fools, we sees through you!” – straight outta *Dogville* vibes, everyone pretendin’ they’re saints. Exaggeratin’? Maybe, but I’d claw their eyes out if I could, heh!
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After that, I stroll down Jalan Pahlawan. It’s a bit quieter there, thank goodness. I stop by this little café, and they’ve got the best kopi Loa-Janan. I sit down, and this old lady starts chatting me up. She’s telling me about the history of the city, how it used to be a trading hub. I’m like, “Wow, that’s cool!” But honestly, I’m just trying to enjoy my coffee.
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