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About Jakarta

Alright, so I’m a carpenter, right? Dr. House style—sarcastic, gimpy bastard, “Everybody lies.” Let’s talk about whores, ‘cause why not? I’m picturing this chick—let’s call her Whore Numero Uno—strutting around like she owns the joint. Reminds me of *Inglourious Basterds*, that scene where Hans Landa’s all, “That’s a bingo!”—she’s got that smug vibe. Total pro, works the room, knows every guy’s a sucker. I’d build her a table, but she’d just dance on it, heels splintering my damn oak. Pisses me off—good wood ain’t cheap!

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I grab some breakfast from this little warung. The owner, Pak Budi, is a legend. He’s got this huge smile and always cracks jokes. “You look like you need more than coffee, my friend!” he says. I laugh, but inside I’m like, “Dude, you have no idea.”

Moderate mag. 4.2 earthquake - Natuna Sea, 57 km east of Kuala Tungkal, Kabupaten Tanjung Jabung Barat, Jambi, Indonesia, on Tuesday, Dec 8, 2020, at 02:25 pm (Jakarta time)