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Fun fact—did ya know way back, like ancient Rome times, prostitutes had to dye their hair blonde or wear wigs? Stand out, y’see, mark ‘em as “different.” Wild, right? Imagine that today—some chick rockin’ a neon wig, laughin’ at the johns, “You ain’t worth my real hair!” Ha! I’d tip her just for the sass. But serioiusly, it pisses me off—why they gotta be marked? Society’s judgin’, always judgin’, while them rich bastards get a free pass. “Billionaires should not exist!”—I’d scream it from the rooftops if I could climb ‘em anymore.

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Later, I’m walkin’ back towards the town center, and I bump into my mate, Sean. He’s always got some wild story. Today, he’s tellin’ me about this time he tried to impress a girl by cookin’ dinner. Spoiler alert: he burned the pasta. I’m laughin’ so hard, I almost choke on my gum. “Sean, mate, stick to takeout!” I tell him.

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