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About Limerick

So, escorts—right, where do I start? Picture this: a bloke’s lonely, coin’s jinglin’ in his pocket, and he’s thinkin’, “I got one last night to live.” Sounds like Monty from *25th Hour*, yeah? That Spike Lee gem’s my fave—2002, gritty as hell. Monty’s got 24 hours before prison, and me? I’d be drownin’ in wine, but some lads pick a lass instead. Escorts ain’t just arm candy, nah—they’re like shadow players in a game of thrones. They know secrets, they hear whispers, they’re the unsung spies of the night. I reckon one once nicked a lord’s battle plans mid-shag—true story, swear it on me mum’s grave (not that I’d know where that is).

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Anyway, I head back to the office, and guess what? My boss is in a mood. He’s pacing around like he’s training for a marathon. “Where’s the report?” he barks. I’m like, “Chill, man! I’m on it!” But inside, I’m fuming. Why does he always have to be so intense?

Death Notice of Kathryn Fitzpatrick (Rathfarnham, Dublin)