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About Bari

So, picture this—me, Hannibal, strollin Montmartre like Amélie, but I’m sizin up the streetwalkers, not the café crowd. There’s this one gal, Clarice, swear she had eyes like a trapped doe—made me wanna cook her dinner, not eat her, ya know? Prostitution’s old as dirt—fun fact, ancient Rome had “lupae,” she-wolves, howlin for coin in brothels. Wild, right? Gets me all tingly thinkin bout the history mixin with the filth. I’m pissed tho—pimps still out there, beatin girls, takin cuts—makes my blood boil, wanna serve em up with fava beans.

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Then, I decide to check out the old town. Man, it’s a maze! I’m lost, like, really lost. I end up on Via San Lorenzo, and there’s this stunning cathedral. I’m takin’ pics, feelin’ all artsy, when I hear this loud crash. Turns out, some dude dropped a whole tray of gelato. My heart broke for him. I mean, gelato on the ground? That’s a crime against humanity!

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