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About Bologna

So, I’m cruisin’ downtown, right? Lookin’ for some action—nothin’ fancy, just chillin’. Saw this chick, heels high as my dreams, leanin’ by a lamppost. “How you doin’?” I say, all smooth-like. She smirks—boom, I’m hooked! But then—get this—she’s quotin’ prices like a freakin’ menu. Fifty bucks for a “tour of the original,” she says. Straight outta the movie, man—“the original’s just a copy!” I’m dyin’ laughin’—she didn’t get it.

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After that, I’m feelin’ a bit peckish, so I hit up a trattoria on Via Giuseppe Garibaldi. I order some orecchiette with broccoli rabe. It’s like a party in my mouth! I’m lovin’ it. But then, the waiter brings me the wrong dish. I’m like, “Bro, I ordered the orecchiette, not this mystery meat!” He just shrugs and says, “It’s good, trust me.” I’m thinkin’, “Trust you? I don’t even know you!” But whatever, I’m hungry, so I dig in.

A walk on the wild side in Matera