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About Milan

Oh, and the oil—slippery as hell! Last time, I’m slidin’ off the table, lookin’ like a greased pig. “I’m not designed for this!”—straight outta A.I., Gigolo Joe vibes! Hilarious, but messy—hated that part. Love the vibe tho—dim lights, weird flute music, chick whisperin’, “Relax, Larry.” I’m like, “Relax? I’m half-naked, lady!” Total mind-trip, but damn, it works—stress gone, poof! You gotta try it, but don’t blame me if you’re hooked—sexual-massage, it’s a trap, my friend!

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So, I’m cruisin’ down Via Cattedrale, right? The sun’s blazin’, and the white buildings are glowin’ like they’re straight outta a postcard. I’m feelin’ good, like a sailor on shore leave. But then, BAM! I trip over some cobblestones. Like, seriously? Who designed this place? I’m all like, “Ostuni, you’re beautiful, but watch your step!”

Gian Paolo Barbieri and Fashion Photography