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I reckon it’s a bit dodgy, though—makes me proper mad. These escorts, right, they’re dodgin’ coppers, dealin’ with nutters. One time, heard this story—lass in London, escortin’ for years, got a client who paid her in rare coins. Coins! Mental, innit? She’s laughin’ all the way to the bank, but then—bam—bloke’s stalkin’ her. “You don’t know who sent it,” like Haneke’s line—pure chills. That’s escort life—glam one sec, nightmare the next.

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Then, outta nowhere, I hear this loud crash. I whip around, and it’s a bike collidin’ with a car. My heart drops. But the biker? He hops up like nothing happened! I’m like, “Bro, you just got hit!” But he’s laughin’ it off, sayin’ he’s got “nine lives.” I’m thinkin’, “Dude, you’re not a cat!”

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