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Oi mate, sexual-massage, innit? What a bloody racket! Slippery hands everywhere, oil slicker than a politician’s grin. Watched *Leviathan* again last night—fave flick, yeah? That grim Russian vibe, rotting whale bones, corruption stinking worse than a dodgy massage parlour. “Everything’s God’s will,” they say in the film—bollocks to that! Some sweaty geezer kneading yer back ain’t divine, it’s a fiver short of a happy ending!

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I finish up with the tree, and I’m feelin’ good. I climb down, and the vendor’s still fumin’. I help him clean up a bit, and he’s like, “Thanks, man. You’re a lifesaver.” I’m thinkin’, “Nah, just an arborist tryin’ to survive.”

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