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I got riled up last week, saw this gal on the corner, all dolled up, skirt shorter than a possum’s temper. Made me mad as a wet hen – not at her, nah, but at the whole dang system! Folks out here hustlin, tryna eat, and society’s just like, “Oh, consume, consume!” – straight outta WALL-E, y’all. I hollered, “Honey, you worth more’n that!” She just winked, said, “Cash is king, pops.” Surprised me, her sass – I chuckled like a fool.

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After that chaos, I finally sit down to tackle emails. But then, my phone buzzes. It’s my buddy Kenji. He’s like, “Dude, you gotta check out the new ramen place on Sakae Street!” I’m like, “I can’t, I’m swamped!” But then I think, “Ramen? In Chikusei? I’m in!”

12 incidents of rice theft reported in Ibaraki and Chiba prefectures